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6 Things I would tell my high school (and current) self

10/19/2018

8 Comments

 
​High school was probably some of the best and worst years of my life. It was during those 5 years I discovered I didn’t fit into the crowd (most of us don’t), leading to a very confusing search to find the true me. In between it all I tried to figure out how my childhood faith and relationship with Jesus would look like into adulthood. 
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​Clearly, following Jesus called me to be different; so I took a year or two of not being too serious about Him - by grace I realized how unfulfilling that would be. It was in high school I chose to follow Jesus with everything – no matter what. Sadly, I also saw many walk away, choosing to follow the world instead.
​
If I could do it again – there are a few things I’d do different. While listing them today, I realized how applicable they still are. Perhaps this is true for you too.  

1. Get to know all sorts of people
“Love your neighbour as yourself...” - Mark 12:31
​I remember sitting next to people in class I wouldn’t necessarily get the opportunity to befriend in my current season of life. Although I wasn’t completely unaware of them and did create some opportunities to get to know them – I wish I wasn’t so obsessed with my own social status and whether or not it allowed me to be their friend. I wish I just befriended them anyway. 
​I wish I listened to their stories and didn’t think twice about greeting them in the hallways. I wish I sat with them during break time when they had no one else to sit with and I wish I invited them to social gatherings.  
​Often we get so caught up in our own lives that we miss opportunities to be the light in some else’s. We miss hearing about the lady behind the till’s day, because we’re in a hurry to get home. We miss spending time with people who need our support, because we’d rather feel sorry for ourselves. We miss listening, because we’d rather just talk about ourselves.
"​I wish I listened to their stories and didn’t think twice about greeting them in the hallways."

2. Speak up 
“For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.” – 2 Timothy 1:7
​In high school I participated in drama and public speaking, so I was never really considered shy. But even though I could get up and say something in a room full of people, I often struggled to say something in a group of friends. Among my peers I often felt insignificant and very insecure. What if I said something and it made me look stupid? What if they didn’t like me? Why would they want to talk to me anyway?
​To be really honest with you this is something I still struggle with. I need to remind myself that God created me and that He loves me and that I am good enough. Because of this I don’t have to stand in the corner timid and shy – I can speak up! I have nothing to be afraid of – in fact; I have something to give.
"I need to remind myself that God created me and that He loves me and that I am good enough."

3. Be a light, not a judge
“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” – Matthew 5:16
​I’m a little bit embarrassed to admit this, but right after fully committing my life to Jesus; I fell into the trap of telling people how wrong their sinful lives were. I spoke openly about how I was living fully for Christ and often; very publicly; missed the mark. I’m honestly not very proud of the way I represented the Kingdom during those years. 
​I’ve learnt since that my good deeds should speak for themselves and that I really shouldn’t claim to be or know better than anyone else. We are not called to make the world live holy lives – we are called to point them to Jesus. He makes them holy. In Christian circles we often emphasize the sin of the world, rather than their lost- and brokenness. 
“For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.” - John 3:17

​4. Build deep friendships
“One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” – Proverbs 18:24
​One thing I really don’t miss about high school is having so many superficial friendships. I specifically remember one incident where I was “hanging out” with girls I had nothing in common with and didn’t even like; only because we belonged to the same social group. 
​I happen to think that one of the most admirable qualities in life is being real. Authenticity is always a vulnerable position, but it’s the only way to build deep, meaningful friendships. Sometimes we have to open our hearts and face the possibility of rejection. 
"Sometimes we have to open our hearts and face the possibility of rejection." 
​I cannot even begin to pretend that I have this figured out. When and where and how to be authentic is still a journey I’m on. What I do know is that authenticity is part of God’s original design. It’s leading us right back to our true nature of being naked and unashamed (Genesis 2:25). 

5. Enjoy singleness
“For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.” - Habakuk 2:3
​I was thinking more in the direction of Ecclesiastes 3:11, but then this verse from Habakuk caught my eye. He will not delay! My friend, this is not a promise that He will send you a husband; but rather that He is present in your current season – He’s not late – He didn’t forget about you!
​In high school, especially during the two years I wasn’t seeking Jesus with everything; I was seeking to have a boyfriend (with everything). I believed that if I could find someone whose world revolved around me, then I would be significant and then I would be safe. Meanwhile the safest place I could be was in my Saviour’s arms and His divine timing. 
"He’s never late – He’s already here!"
​Whether or not you are single or married – God has a plan for you in this season! It’s so easy to miss out on what God’s doing now, because we’re distracted by what He’ll do next. I’m not pretending that this is easy – you’re going to need His help – that’s why it’s called trusting Him. Breath it in. Embrace it. Enjoy it. He’s never late – He’s already here!

6. Learn to play the piano
“...and I have filled him with the Spirit of God, with wisdom, with understanding, with knowledge and with all kinds of skills.”
​– Exodus 31:3
​I’ve always wanted to play piano, but seemed to think that because I didn’t start taking lessons at the age of 5, I would never be able to.  This was a lie. I believed that all I could ever do was develop the skills I already had. I compared myself to others and was afraid to try anything I might not be good at. 
​We often limit ourselves, because we don’t allow ourselves to dream. We don’t believe that the Spirit gives us the skills we need to chase the dreams He placed in our hearts.
​I started playing piano the year after school. Even though I’m still very much in the development phase of this skill – I’ve already seen God use it in facilitating worship. I realize that playing piano is not just a childish dream, but something God placed in my heart for a specific purpose.
"​We often limit ourselves, because we don’t allow ourselves to dream."
​Having dreams that stretch you are worth it! God really has a bigger plan for your life than you do.

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8 Comments
Sara Brunsvold link
10/22/2018 04:32:01 pm

Yes to all of these, including the piano. I felt that way about guitar for so many years. Finally I took lessons in my 30s and never regretted it! :)

Reply
Riani
10/23/2018 08:06:11 am

That's great Sara! Music is really such a blessing. Thank you for your comment!

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Kiersten link
10/22/2018 05:20:10 pm

There are several things on your post that I would like to tell my younger self. I was painfully shy as a teen and I often just did things alone or didn't participate at all. If I could go back, I would push past the shyness and live my life!

Reply
Riani
10/23/2018 08:08:48 am

Me to Kriesten! However, I think because I've experienced being shy and insecure in that way - I have so much more empathy with the younger girls I work with. Even in that God taught me a lesson.

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Mihaela Echols link
10/22/2018 07:01:48 pm

I wish I learned piano. I started in high school and i should’ve continued.

Reply
Riani
10/23/2018 08:09:49 am

Why not start now Mihaela?

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Anne- onedeterminedlife link
10/23/2018 04:08:14 am

I love this list. Those are all great things to have learned earlier on in life. I think if I could go back and tell myself something in high school I would say to not be so afraid to share the gospel. There are many people I was not a great light to and I wish I had been.

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Riani
10/23/2018 08:10:31 am

This is so true! Thank you Anne!

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    Queen in Gold is a blog for the feminine heart. I hope to inspire other women to stand up in their God-given identity.
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    My name is Riani.
    ​I love flowers, board games, arty markets, food, dancing, music and spring....
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