Why I stopped using hormonal birth control - and you should probably too

Queen in Gold

Why I stopped using hormonal birth control - and you should probably too

3/8/2025

I'm no medical expert, but because I am convinced this is a necessary discussion, here we are.

I can’t give you all the facts about all the hormones and what they do to your body, but I can share my story. I hope to get you thinking, praying, and asking questions.

What I knew about birth control

Charl and I met in July 2020 and married only 8 months and 2 weeks later. It was COVID, those were different times. The point is that we had a very short, 2-month engagement. Many big decisions needed to be made, including what we would do regarding birth control.

I previously heard that certain types of birth control could prevent the implantation of an already fertilized egg. Now I must confess: I had a very vague idea of how conception and even my own cycle worked. But even if I didn't completely understand it, nor have the vocabulary to explain it, the idea of telling my body to “let go” of an egg after it had already been fertilized; didn't seem morally right.

Apart from that, I heard a few stories about the pill causing depression, a wacky cycle, a low libido, or in the long term, cancer.

That's it. That is pretty much what I knew about birth control up to that point.

"... I had a very vague idea of how conception and even my own cycle worked..."

What to use?

Charl and I read an article or two that listed the pros and cons of different birth control methods. It was confusing. We didn't feel ready to have a baby immediately, but none of the methods on the list seemed like the “perfect fit” for us.

My mother managed to get me a last-minute appointment with her gynecologist.

During this appointment, I mentioned my 2 major concerns to her:

We didn’t want to use something that would prevent implantation.
I was concerned about something that would cause me to become depressed.

Then, she proceeded to explain different methods to me.

The most natural method on her list was the calendar method. This means using your monthly cycle to predict when you are most likely fertile and then abstaining from unprotected intercourse during that time. Most apps women use to log and predict periods mark this “fertile time" for us. She wrote it off as very unreliable, especially because my cycle isn’t always regular.

I have to agree with her, predicting your fertility based on the day of your cycle, is probably not that accurate. Statistically, the calendar method (also called the rhythm method) has a success rate of 75-92%. In comparison, "the pill" has a 93-99% success rate.

The gynecologist failed to mention, however, that looking at the calendar, is not the only way to predict fertility.

Then she asked me a few questions about my family history and prescribed a birth control pill. I asked her if there was a chance I would get depressed on the pill. She assured me I wouldn't.

The package leaflet said there was.

Life on the pill

I ended up being on the pill for about 6 or 7 months.

I'd be lying if I said there were no pros:

I didn't get pregnant (That's kind of the point, neh?)
I had a very predictable cycle.
It was even possible to manipulate my cycle to not be on my period during our honeymoon.
I had shorter and lighter periods than usual.

It took a while to realize how emotionally unstable it made me feel. I kept blaming my unstable emotions on all the other changes happening in my life; getting married to this guy I barely knew, moving in with him (obviously), joining a different church, starting a new job, and doing all of it in the middle of COVID.

"...I wasn’t myself anymore and became desperate to find another way..."

I realized I was in a cycle of feeling either down and depressed, or sometimes just a bit numb. I wasn’t myself anymore and became desperate to find another way.

Then I Google searched something like “natural ways to prevent pregnancy.”

Fertility Awareness

As I mentioned, looking at the calendar is not the only way to predict fertility. It's also possible through tracking things like basal body temperature and cervical mucus. When using a combined version of these things they can have a success rate of 86-96%

Here’s something important you need to know about birth control methods and their effectiveness:

The more room there is for human error, the less effective they are.

When you get an implant or IUD, you don’t need to think about it again. There’s a pretty good chance you won’t get pregnant. When you need to remember to drink a pill every day, there’s a higher chance of getting pregnant. Fertility awareness methods require a daily commitment to tracking fertility and either abstaining from intercourse or applying a barrier method on unsure or fertile days.

Why is this relevant?

If you’re serious about not falling pregnant, you’re more likely to succeed. If you’re open to the possibility of a baby, you’ll be less serious about making this method work. Trust me – I know.

Trusting God

Do you know what I really dislike about birth control?

The word “control.”

“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.” – Proverbs 16:9

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.” – Psalm 139:13

The scariest thing about going off the pill was the possibility of getting pregnant before I felt ready. But God was inviting me to trust Him. Children are a reward and a heritage from the Lord (Psalm 127:3). One of the prominent reasons He created marriage and sexual union is for procreation (Gen 1:27-28). Can we confess His Word as truth, but hold this area so firmly within our own "control?"

"...I'm just not sure if having a sense of control is worth putting something potentially harmful in your body..?"

I’m not saying applying wisdom and using a form of birth control is wrong (please read Counter-cultural Motherhood Part 2 for more on this topic). I'm just not sure if having a sense of control is worth putting something potentially harmful in your body?

I stopped using hormonal birth control – you should probably too!!

While writing this post, I did some more research, especially about the combination pill I used.

The pill contains hormones that prevent ovulation by telling your body you’ve already ovulated. It basically “tricks” your body by giving it similar hormones to what would naturally be present after ovulation. This seemed ethically okay...

The thing is; if your body isn’t producing hormones according to your natural cycle, it’s not preparing for a pregnancy. If by some small chance, you happen to ovulate and that egg happens to get fertilized, there's a chance the egg won’t be able to implant.

In a natural cycle, your uterus lining thickens for a fertilized egg to be implanted, but sheds when there is no pregnancy (aka menstruation). Due to the way the pill works, it thins the uterus lining over time. The pill is actually sometimes prescribed for women with a thick uterus lining to ease heavy and painful periods.

I wrote about how Charl and I didn't want to use a form of birth control that would prevent implantation. One could argue that it’s not what the pill was designed to do, BUT there’s a chance it could.

I didn’t know that then, but I do now. I think it's important that you do too.

Your body is not your own

“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.” – 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

In context, this verse addresses sexual immorality. It teaches that we should honor God with our sexual conduct. There’s no denying the relation between sexual conduct and procreation, but I believe the principle is viewing your body as God’s property – His dwelling place – honoring Him with everything you do.

A little bit further on, Paul writes about avoiding idolatry:

“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive... So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” – 1 Corinthians 10:23,31

And that’s what I’d like to leave you with:

Whatever your choices are regarding birth control – do it all for the glory of God.

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